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Retirement Quotes And Jokes

A daughter takes her old father to a retirement home. Retirement is the time in your life when time is no longer money.


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Here are 10 retirement quotes for retirees and soon-to-be retirees to help them retire happy wild and free.

Retirement quotes and jokes. Two old guys from a senior center were sipping lemonade on the porch. Retirement jokes pertaining to the profession of the retiree Accountants dont retire they just lose their balance Bank managers dont retire they just lose interest Golfers never retire they just lose their drive Looking Good Three elderly gentlemen were talking about what their grandchildren would be saying about them fifty years from now. Funny Retirement Sayings and Quotes Read More.

Retirement gives people the opportunity to think about and reconnect with themselves and their neglected dreams or the forgotten pleasure of activities that bring joy. Retire from your job but never retire your mind. Just because you are getting older and have retired doesnt mean that you should have less confidence in your abilities.

How are you feeling Ralph says Like a brand new baby No kidding. 8019 346 votes. These retirement quotations come from the Sensational Quotes for Smart People Website.

_Before your retirement you need to start thinking before your boss. It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man Scott Elledge. One asks the other Ralph Im 92 years old and even my aches have pains.

8057 324 votes. Retirement is the only time in your life when time no longer equals money. Funny Retirement Poems Retirement Pictures Retirement Cards Early Retirement Retirement Planning Financial Planning Funny Quotes For Teens Funny Quotes About Life Mantra.

Be nice to your kids. 8042 390 votes. You must be close to my age.

Forbes once said that retirement kills more people than hard work ever did. Old widower Henry is celebrating his 80th birthday in the retirement home and his friends decide to hire a hooker to entertain him. A daughter takes her old father in a wheelchair to a retirement home for the first time.

_Retirement is a great thing. Funny Retirement Quotes More Funny Quotes About Retirement Funny Retirement Sayings Retirement Question and Answer Session If My Body Was a Car What the Professions Say About Retiring Ten Ways In Which You Know You Are Over the Hill. No teeth no hair and wet diapers.

33 Retirement is a fence on one side lies hard work and on the other lies boredom. You will face boredom and more down time now that you are officially out of service. The question isnt at what age I want to retire its at what income.

Like a brand new baby Yep. Family kids life retirement. How Do You Feel.

We think youll feel quite at home here. Danny McGoorty Irish Pool Player. Three More Helpful Retirement Jokes.

34 Retirement is like a bubble that burst just when you think you are at the zenith of your career. The best part about retirement is spending time with the grandkids. To me a job is an invasion of privacy.

You dont stop laughing when you age you age when you stop laughing. My best days in retirement are when I give back to the community. Mona Gallagher If you retire.

Have fun old timer. Inspirational Retirement Quotes Here are some of the most popular inspirational quotes on retirement that you should read before retiring as well as after. The good news is that Im only going to make one retirement speech and this is it When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance his colleagues generally present him with a watch R C Sherriff It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man Scott Elledge.

I have never liked working. There is an enormous number of managers who have retired on the job. If you are a retiree you need some form of entertainment to keep you busy to help you through the transition.

Inspirational Retirement Quotes. So early that evening a beautiful blond shows up at his door and says HI Im Susie and Im here to give you super sex Henry looks her. _Why do you think people smile most of the time after their retirement.

It is because they are unable to hear most of the things that you are saying. Either ways its no fun. Some short retirement jokes and quotes.

Theyll choose your nursing home. It is because you do not have to worry about doing nothing and that too without getting caught. 32 Retirement is said to be the slow and painful lead up to the sunset years of your life.

The nurse expecting their arrival greets them with Welcome to the Johnson family retirement home. Retirement kills more people than hard work ever did - Malcolm Forbes The moneys no better in retirement but the hours are - Anonymous Retirement without the love of letters is a living burial - Seneca I have never liked working.


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